 Marriage
God's Plan for Marriage
I contrast the culture's caricature of marriage to what God says about it in His word, explaining the dynamics of the husband/wife relationship from a biblical perspective. I also make three suggestions for working with God's plan: Don't be his mother, don't try to fix his life, and don't act like a little girl.
The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands
"Men admittedly are putty in the hands of a woman they love. Give him direct communication, respect, appreciation, food and good lovin', and he'll do just about anything you wish—foolish or not." —Dr. Laura Schlessinger, in her book The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands. I go into helpful detail on these needs of husbands: direct communication, respect, appreciation, and good lovin'.
Trash Your Marriage in 8 Easy Steps
This tongue-in-cheek message provides some humor along with the insight of 8 ways to wreck a marriage—and, of course, how to build it by doing the opposite! The 8 ways are: 1) Be selfish; 2) Pick at each other; 3) Let the kids become more important than your husband 4) Show disrespect for him, especially in public; 5) Refuse to meet his emotional needs; 6) Treat your girlfriends better than your husband; 7) Be his mother instead of lover; 8) When you're angry, blow up.
Intimate Issues
We get REAL in this talk! Drawing on the book by the same name, I answer these questions: Why Did God give the gift of sex? What does He thinks of it? What do I do when I don't want to do it? What's not OK in bed? What about oral sex?
Why Marriages Fail
There are four "weenie" (WENI) behaviors, totally avoidable, that most contribute to the breakup of healthy, loving marriages: Withdrawal and avoidance, Escalation, Negative interpretation, and Invalidation. Don't be a "WENI": learn to save your marriage by identifying and stopping these hurtful ways of relating.
Children
Boys Are From Mars, Girls Are From Venus: Raising Gender Healthy Kids
I contrast the differences between girls and boys to equip moms to have realistic expectations about their children and heighten appreciation for the strengths of both. Celebrating our children's gender is an essential part of building a healthy sense of gender identity so they won't struggle with same-sex issues when they're older. This is my most popular MOPS message, and the subject of the book I'm writing.
5 Love Languages
This message is taken from Dr. Gary Chapman's classic book on love languages, focusing on our children: focused attention, gifts, physical touch, words of affirmation, and acts of service.
Disciplining Your Children
Topics covered: Have realistic expectations. Speak softly. Give focused attention. Detach. Decide on what the rules are, and the consequences. Discipline at home and the classroom. The strong-willed child.
Raising Godly Children
The real key to raising godly children is by modeling some of God's attributes to our children: by being godly parents. Some of His attributes are especially important in parenting: love, consistency, respectful, communicator, truth. I offer lots of practical help in working this out in our families.
Teaching Our Children About God
Use teachable moments to fulfill the Bible's command to parents to teach about Him. I walk through the "Big Story" of God's book and His plan for people so moms can know it for themselves. And we talk about teaching children to pray.
Shaming Families, Grace-Based Families
I contrast the differences in families marked by shaming each other, and those families that operate by extending grace to each other: the way they treat each other, the words they speak, their expectations of each other, and more.
Personal Growth
Boundary Basics
John Townsend and Henry Cloud's book Boundaries ranks right up there with the Bible for essential reading and practice for healthy people. The foundations of understanding and setting boundaries, as well as maintaining them without feeling guilty, are covered.
Conflict Resolution
The Bible gives the world's best counsel on how to deal with conflict so that it honors everyone involved. But there are ways to avoid unnecessary conflict as well, and it's wise to be aware of those strategies too.
Changing our Negative Self-Talk
I identify a long list of lies ("old tapes") we tell ourselves, messages from parents, childhood classmates, the media, and ourselves. We are in bondage to these tapes, especially if we don't even realize they are there. After identifying each lie, I provide the biblical truth with which to fight the old tape.
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